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Thursday, June 26, 2014

Out With The Old: Calories-in Versus Calories-Out

Calories-in, calories-out.  Lose weight.  Gain weight.  You eat.  You exercise.  It's all connected.  Then they say it isn't.  But it has to be a little bit, right???  Otherwise gastric bypass surgery wouldn't work at all. 

I have been doing ALL the stuff.  (You can read that blog HERE.)  I'm eating so much better than I used to.  Almost no fast food (maybe twice in the last few months and those were salads from Wendy's -- my favorite!).  I have cut my sugar intake drastically.  Jellybeans?  Gone!  Vitamin Waters?  Gone!  Donut day?!  Gone (well I have taken a couple of bites here and there but I am not eating them every Friday)!  I'm making the majority of my food at home.  I'm reading labels.  I'M PUTTING SHIT BACK ON THE SHELF WHEN IT DOESN'T HAVE WHAT I NEED!  Who am I?! 

But where's all my weight loss?  I know.  I know.  I didn't do this to lose weight!  I am doing it to get healthy after years of having a horrible relationship with food and my body.  And, sure, there are a lot of good things going on -- I feel great, and am actually requiring less food.  After two weeks of returning home each evening with the afternoon snack I would pack for work, today I finally decided to stop bringing an afternoon snack.  Ellen says this means I'm making better food choices that are sustaining me longer.  YAY! 

I read a couple of articles about calories and why eating real food doesn't equate to weight loss, so I wanted to talk about them. 

For years I made the argument that a calorie was a calorie.  And why did anyone care if I chose my calories to be ice cream and cake instead of fruits and vegetables?  But now I know that is not the truth.  Besides the fact that ice cream and cake take up less room, so they are less filling with more calories, there are VITAL vitamins you get from eating fresh fruits and veggies.  Here are some great tidbits from THIS article:

"Thinking that all calories are the same is an antiquated notion. Granted, by definition calories represent units of energy provided by a particular food, but thinking they’re all alike is like saying a diamond and a rhinestone are the same because they both glitter. With calories, as with diamonds, it’s the quality that matters most and enhances their value."

"So what’s the work-around? Trade hunger, calorie-counting and denial, for filling, nutrient-dense, organic or local produce, poultry, pasture-raised meats and wild fish. Eat them until you are full, not until you’ve hit some abstract, virtually meaningless magic number. By eating these kinds of foods, your body will tell you when you’ve had enough. Eating refined carbs like wheat, grains and sugar—the crystal meth of the supermarket aisle—never will."

I personally still choose to track my food.  Mostly because I'm trying to make that stupid pie chart hit the 40-30-30 mark (40% carbs, 30% fat, 30% protein).  But I am hitting my calorie goal each day without trying.  I don't feel like I'm dieting.  In fact, I feel like I'm eating better than ever!  I am also eating close to a 50% fat diet since starting with Ellen's nutritional program in early May (good fats like coconut oil, nuts and olive oil) and have lost almost four pounds in the last two months.  I know.  That doesn't sound like a lot, but I don't lose weight quickly.  Ever.  My body has always done this bounce around thing.  Up 4 pounds.  Down 5.  Up 3.  Down 2.  Up 4.  Down 6.  It's crazy.  I am no longer bouncing around and am now consistently losing small amounts of weight each week.  And I am at my lowest weight in almost two years (my highest weight last year after foot surgery was 263 pounds.  I am now down to 252 pounds). 

I was also reading THIS article about why eating real food might not equate to weight loss.  I do take issue with her blaming obesity on certain diseases.  I like something Ellen posted in our Balanced Table group.  It is poor diet choices (processed food, sugar, etc.) causing Type 2 Diabetes, heart attacks, cancer, etc.  Not obesity.  What do they say?  Correlation not causation?  Anyway, I think the article still contains some good information.  Reasons you might not be losing weight?

Digestion: "Weight loss will not happen if the body is malnourished and unhealthy. That’s the least concern of the body, therefore it will focus on repairing and bringing down the inflammation before it even thinks of shrinking fat cells, especially if it doesn’t have the proper energy to do so."

Food sensitivities: "The good news is sensitivities are not allergies and can be reversed, but this requires eliminating certain foods that an individual may be reacting to for a period of time while their body heals."

Yeast overgrowth: "Correcting imbalances can diminish cravings for sugar and sweets, improves digestion and absorption of nutrients, and reduces the amount of toxins the body is exposed to."

Stress: "This is directly linked to maintaining healthy adrenal function which regulates cortisol levels, sex hormones (which is another underlying cause of weight gain), and of course adrenaline and epinephrine- which put you in a state of fight or flight. Stress eats up B vitamins, Magnesium, hinders digestion, and causes imbalances in blood sugar that cause the adrenals to work overtime."

Toxin overload: "Bottom line, we must limit our exposure as much as possible, and more importantly, take a pro active approach to support our body’s ability to decongest and rid these toxins properly to get the stress off our detoxification organs (i.e. LIVER!). The body can then focus on ridding toxins from fat cells which is where they accumulate!"

Dysfunction of the master glands: "Making sure adequate amounts of amino acids are being utilized and getting enough essential fatty acids, along with a diet rich in vitamins and minerals is crucial for support. Possible cause of the weakening of these master glands can include a diet high in sugar, refined carbohydrates, digestive problems, stress, and even heavy metal toxicity."

So the adventure continues to regain my health through better food choices.  I am also working hard on being strong.  Lots of yoga, pole and cycle.  Next year, my test scores better be perfect!!!

Tuesday, June 24, 2014

Northern California Pole Presentational Tickets On Sale!

Want to come support local pole dancers??  Tickets to Nor Cal Pole Presentational just went on sale!  Don't miss out!  We have dancers from pretty much every studio in Northern California (plus some from Southern California and other states).  The event will be held Saturday, August 23, 2014 in San Jose, California (exact start time and schedule TBA).  Come out for a fun day of pole dance and shopping!


There is still time to sponsor!!  http://www.northerncapolepresentational.com/sponsors/

Want to volunteer?  http://www.northerncapolepresentational.com/volunteer/

Want to find us on Facebook?  https://www.facebook.com/NorCalPolePresentational

Want to buy cool Pat gear?  http://www.cafepress.com/polenorcal

See you in August!



Photo credit: http://www.liquidpulp.com/


Monday, June 23, 2014

Pole Dance America

Awhile back, Trixie from Pole Nation asked me if I would come judge a competition.  I immediately told her no.  I felt like I wasn't qualified to judge people on moves I couldn't do myself.  She assured me I would be just fine and asked me again to please come help judge a Pole Dance America (PDA)preliminary competition at a studio in Santa Cruz.  Well, you know me, always up for an adventure.  So I said yes!

The competition was held over the weekend at Aerial Arts Santa Cruz.  The studio had really tall ceilings, with room for many aerial apparatuses.  As soon as I walked in, I eyeballed the chair I needed to sit in.  The other judges kindly allowed me to have the queen chair.  The competitors were made up of students from Aerial Arts, and I don't believe any had ever competed before.  PDA travels to studios all over to the country to hold these preliminary competitions.  Their finals will be held next year.  Round 1 is done without music.  Each competitor writes down the official moves on which they would like to be judged.  The round is videotaped, and after they were done, we got to review the video and judge each move individually.  I had been worried about being able to judge people on the fly.  But being able to review the video, rewind and re-watch moves really, really helped.  And if there was a move that I wasn't sure about, I looked it up to make sure I was judging it properly.  It was a long process, but it made me so much more confident that I was able to offer a proper score and constructive feedback. 

Round 2 allowed music and was a more traditional pole dance showcase/competition routine.  We got to score based on the creativeness and the musicality, etc. 

The entire day was a lot of fun.  I enjoyed seeing the studio, meeting Jeanette of Aerial Arts and fellow judge Donna from Atomic Allure (a studio in Oakland, which will be holding its own preliminary competition in October).  I appreciate Trixie for thinking of me and giving me this fun opportunity to learn more about how their organization and compeition work!  Congratulations to the winners, who will be moving on the PDA finals in New Orleans next year!

Thursday, June 19, 2014

Long term weight loss almost impossible...

Recently, I read an article on CBC News.  The title:  "Obesity research confirms long-term weight loss almost impossible."  (Side note: there is A LOT I find wrong with that article but just wanted to use it to start a conversation.)  FINALLY!  People are saying this out loud.  I posted it on Facebook and someone immediately stated that they aren't inclined to believe it until they see it published in a medical journal.  I don't need to see it published anywhere.  I can just look around and see that it appears to be true.  People who try to lose weight very often gain it back, plus some.  I have played the game for my entire life.  This can't just be that all fatties have no willpower. 

We all think we know someone in that rare group. They become the legends — the friend of a friend, the brother-in-law, the neighbour — the ones who really did it.

But if we check back after five or 10 years, there's a good chance they will have put the weight back on. Only about five per cent of people who try to lose weight ultimately succeed, according to the research. Those people are the outliers, but we cling to their stories as proof that losing weight is possible.

"Those kinds of stories really keep the myth alive," says University of Alberta professor Tim Caulfield, who researches and writes about health misconceptions. "You have this confirmation bias going on where people point to these very specific examples as if it's proof. But in fact those are really exceptions."

*****

"An appropriate rebalancing of the primal needs of humans with food availability is essential," University of Oxford epidemiologist Klim McPherson wrote in a Lancet commentary following last week's study. But to do that, he suggested, "would entail curtailing many aspects of production and marketing for food industries."

Perhaps, though, the emerging scientific reality should also be made clear, so we can navigate this obesogenic world armed with the stark truth — that we are held hostage to our biology, which is adapted to gain weight, an old evolutionary advantage that has become a dangerous metabolic liability.

When they say that five percent of people who lose weight succeed, they are also saying that 95% of them fail!  But the diet industry keeps raking in those billions, promising quick weight loss.  And we all just keep sending them our money.  I personally feel like all that yo-yo dieting is way more dangerous than just being fat. 

Here I am, a woman in her late 30's, who has battled her weight for pretty much her entire life.  I started getting chubby at age 12.  I was considered obese by my late teens/early 20's.  I did phen fen.  I did Slim Fast.  I did Weight Watchers.  Yet every year, I was somehow a little fatter.  At my heaviest weight -- 350 pounds -- I did decide to have gastric bypass/weight loss surgery.  I lost 165 pounds.  I didn't come out thin and healthy, though.  In fact, I ended up with more health problems than when I was fat.  And then the weight started creeping on again.  So I started over-exercising to take it off.  I got back down to 200 pounds.  Then I started taking a medication that jump started the weight gain again.  I had gotten back up to 263 pounds.  Now I'm 252 pounds.  And rather than battle my body, I'm focusing on eating right and getting proper exercise.  So, even though weight loss is not my focus, it is still happening.  I want to say that this time, it truly is a lifestyle change and there will not be another episode of weight gain.  But I would have told you that at least three times before...yet here I stand.

I would truly like to believe that I can have Health At Every Size.  But my blood tests tell me I'm not fully healthy.  If sugar is causing inflammation in my body, and I stop eating sugar and lose some weight and my CRP comes down, wouldn't that potentially indicate that maybe *I* can't have health at EVERY size?  I don't know.  I am only speaking about my own situation.  Everyone has their own life to deal with. 

So I am continuing with my quest to eat right and exercise.  I have had some emotional times in the last few weeks and it was actually pretty rough not to turn to my sugary treats.  I gave in once and bought a box of Mike N Ike's, but I'm back on track.  I feel so much better when I leave the sugar alone.  I am always searching for new recipes to try though.  If anyone has any yummy recipes to share, please post them in the comments below! 

Tuesday, June 17, 2014

June 2014 Blog Hop: Body Awareness

For this month's blog hop, we are talking about body consciousness.  The official title is: The Body is Art.  We could consider questions such as "how do we honor our bodies?"  Or, "Tell the story of your body."  I feel like many of you know the story of my body, so I decided to choose this subtopic:

How has being a poler, aerial artist or athlete contributed to your awareness of your body? Are you more critical or satisfied with your body? Are you more in tuned with your body?

Oh I am very aware of my body.  I'm aware of the rolls that hang over my pants.  My thighs that spread wider than I'd like.  My chins that occasionally double up on me.  My arms that sag despite surgical intervention.  My boobs that are a little too large and low for my liking.  Yeah, I have some crazy body awareness.  I'm aware that I don't like my body much.  At the same time, I so appreciate the things it does for me.  It carries me everywhere I need to go, even when I'm in pain.  It lets me dance and do yoga.  It lets me ride a bike.  It lets me swim.  I might grump about my body, and my body may hurt sometimes (thanks to my abuse) but it still gets me to all the places I need to show up.  So I appreciate it for that.  

This is such a funny topic for me.  I am very weird about my body.  On one hand, I hide my body.  I tug at my shirt to cover my fat, even though a lot of my fat was surgically cut off years ago.  On the other hand, I put on tiny shorts on a very regular basis and dance around, often posting photos and videos to public websites.  How does that work?!

See?  I'm so shy!
I've always been a walking contradiction.  When I was at my highest weight and started getting shy about going out in public, I started working with a local band and forcing myself to go out and deal with my new-found phobia.  I had an amazing boss early in my career who always told me "the worst someone can do is say no."  They aren't going to kill me or fire me, as long as I'm asking for something reasonable.  So I've kind of applied that to my entire life.  Even when I really, really don't want to do something, I just force myself to do it.  What's the worst that can happen?  Someone doesn't like me?  Ok.  Whatever.  It gives me an air of confidence that I don't actually have.  I still go home at night wondering if people like me.

I feel that pole dancing has furthered that attitude.  Sure, I am very self-conscious about my appearance and my lack of ability to dance extremely well or do tricks.  But I still do all the shows at Twirly Girls.  I make an effort to create an interesting routine so (most) people aren't wishing I would hurry up and get off stage. I fully realize I am not putting on the most amazing routine of the night.  But still, I do it.

I can't tell you how many times I've been stopped while cosplaying as Candy of Chunky Girl Comics.  Women generally in awe that I would walk around in such small shorts.  Always telling me how much they admire me for being brave.  I guess I'm supposed to be more self-conscious about my thunder thighs.  Oh well.  I guess I always figured if I faked confidence and self-esteem, it might actually happen for me.  Fake it til you make it, right?  It must be working because people are often surprised when I say I struggle with self-esteem issues. 

I recently played around at Twirly Girls and put a video of some of my moves together (still not back to free dancing a full song well).  I am frustrated because I have lists of combos I want to try but when the music starts, I freeze.  So, rather than continuing to talk about my body, I'm going to let you watch my larger-than-average body twirling around the pole and writhing on the floor.  It's my body, and I'll do what I want with it.  If you don't like, look away.  That's my attitude!




Thursday, June 12, 2014

My Happy Place



Something I haven't done in a few years, since I gained weight, is ride horses.  Horses are my happy place.  Ever since I was a little girl, I've loved horses.  My friend in middle school had horses so I used to ride with her.  My mom and sister have had horses for years.  I was lucky enough to have Tank for about five years but had to give him up thanks to money issues five years ago.  In the past five years, I have managed to gain about 50 pounds and have felt heavy, uncoordinated and not strong enough to ride.

My mom has been asking me to go riding for the past year or so.  I told her when I stopped working in San Francisco, I would go.  Well, I have been at my new job for a few months now and it was time to take her up on that offer.  So, last weekend, we went riding on the beach near Monterey.  I was worried I wouldn't be strong enough to pull myself up on the horse.  Or that I would be scared.  Or that I would fall off.  But I was just fine.  Being horseback on the beach really is my happy place. 

My mom did kindly let me ride her more gentle horse, Rio, as my sister's horse, Beau, is also known as "grumpy."  Although Rio did get a little skittish when the waves washed up around his feet, he was a great horse to ride.  There was once incident where an idiot college kid threw a skim board toward us right as a wave washed up and Rio started backing up and preparing to spin.  I had worried if something like that happened, I would have gone right over the saddle.  But my body moved with him like we were one.  My heart rate didn't even increase.  It was awesome! 

We rode along the beach, gathering up cool sand dollars with pretty barnacles on them.  We saw part of a big barge that seems to have crash landed on the beach.  We saw dead seals and birds that will poop on you if you ride through them too quickly.  And, after the ride was over, we let the horses roll on the sand, which is always fun to watch. 

My poor knees and ankles hurt a lot after the ride, so my age is showing there.  But I really had a good time with my mom, which was something our relationship needed as well.  I look forward to adding horseback riding back to my activity roster.  I really missed it!